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THE ONE THING I REGRET AS A TFN FELLOW

 It's been almost two years now and as the days become weeks and weeks to months, I watch myself bidding farewell to my students, my classroom, and my host community.

These days I am fond of just moving around the school, I guess it's because I want to take everything all in before it's time for me to leave.

When I came here and started trying my best to champion courses that will change the trajectory of the lives of the children, I thought that the way I was going, after a few months,  most of these problems would be a thing of the past - I was wrong!

I thought that after all the work we've done and the constant sacrifices we’ve made, when it was finally time to leave, I would feel really proud, almost like a hero, I was wrong!

To be honest, right now when I look at my pupils, and realize that there are some of them who didn't quite make a lot of changes, some of them still can't read and some of them still have no idea what they're doing in school. Now, this right here makes me feel really sad as the days go by.

Agnes Onyekwere and her pupil Isiaka having received his first donation

I start to wish I had more time to make sure they all fall in line and make the desired changes, I feel bad that I would be leaving some changes undone, stones unturned, and some territories uncharted.

I regret that I would be leaving in the midst of all of these problems including the ones I couldn't solve.

This feeling of recent sadness has led me to truly knowledge the real facts, which is that most of these problems have existed for a long time and a few months is not enough to just wipe it all away, some things take time and I have come to realize that it is not a problem I can solve on my own and that's why there was a fellow before me and there'll be a fellow after me, we need to make our own individual actions that will accrue to become the collective force we need to solve real problems.

Just like building a house, I don't need to see what my one brick has built, I am to wait until all the bricks are placed because that is when we can fully see what we've achieved, right now, my job is to place my brick on the one placed before me, I don't need to bother about what happens next as far as I can tell myself that I gave this my best shot.

Comments

  1. It's okay to have this sincere and genuine concerns about your school and host community, but change takes time. You alone can effect all the changes needed, I think what is important that you have contributed your own quota to the challenges you met.

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