THE FLOG OR NOT TO FLOG DEBATE FROM A PSYCHOLOGIST’S POINT OF VIEW

 THE FLOG OR NOT TO FLOG DEBATE FROM A PSYCHOLOGIST’S POINT OF VIEW

INTRODUCTION:

“I was flogged and I turned out fine”. “Our parents dealt with us and that’s why we are better off today!”. I have heard these statements countless times. But in reality, are you really fine? Are you better off today? I mean emotionally and psychologically? Let’s look at it deeply. Can you handle your emotions without having outbursts or meltdowns? What do your relationships look like? How do people close to you feel about your presence? Do you respect your body? How do you treat children? Do you need substances to cope? How about your self-esteem and self-perception? How about how you speak to yourself? Fine can mean many things. It can mean you are just living on the edge as a teacher, parent or caregiver. So did flogging really make you better or damage you emotionally?

If correction (discipline, and not punishment) is the goal, then we must reconsider the place and use of flogging in classrooms and homes. This is because punishment and discipline have quite different purposes when it comes to dealing with a child's misbehaviour. Whereas discipline aims to teach a child how to make a better decision next time, punishment concentrates on making a child suffer for disobeying the rules.

Additionally, I’d argue that because flogging is pain-based, it loses its effectiveness when dealing with children from traumatised backgrounds, whose default behaviour is survival-based. All of their behaviours are cry for help and reactions to situations the way they know best. Inflicting more pain on such children does not make ‘corrective sense’. Pain will only increase their irritability, hypervigilance, or withdrawal.

Lastly, flogging/hitting/beating have increasingly become more popular because they seem to be quick fixes. And a quick fix doesn’t always solve the problem. It just suppresses it. So, my question to you is: do you just want to suppress issues for now and call the child to order, or do you want to make it a teachable moment and instil long-term learning?

Therefore, it makes no psychological sense to adopt flogging as a means of correction.

 

Isiaka, a pupil of Emmanuel Ang. Pry. Sch. 1

THE PSYCHOLOGICAL EFFECTS OF FLOGGING ON A CHILD

Physical punishment like flogging doesn’t work to get children to comply, so parents, teachers, and adults think they have to keep increasing the intensity to get it to work. Physical punishment may work momentarily to stop problematic behaviour because children are afraid of being hit, but it doesn’t work in the long term and can make children more aggressive. That is why it is so dangerous.

A child who always gets physical punishment like flogging is more likely to support using physical violence, such as hitting, to settle disputes with their siblings and peers.

Also, flogging predisposes a child to poor moral internalisation and increased antisocial behaviour. They can well become withdrawn, shy, and inexpressive.

There is evidence that physical punishment, such as flogging, actually worsens children's behaviour over time rather than correcting them. Children will eventually find better and sleek ways to carry out misbehaviors uncaught, repress their feelings or discover alternative negative ways of channelling them.

In addition, children who are always flogged are most likely to become compliant (obeying rules to avoid punishment, not because they understand why) or they become people-pleasers. Doing things to please their teachers, parents, etc. making them “good boys or girls” to their teachers or parents.

Flogging is also connected to several detrimental outcomes for children across all cultures and nations, including poor educational outcomes, physical and mental illness, impaired cognitive and socioemotional development, self-regulation, and poor educational outcomes. Children who are spanked often have a greater risk of low self‐esteem, lying, cheating, and even depression. And they are more prone to physical and mental health issues in later life.

Furthermore, in the context of learning - flogging is counterproductive. It triggers fear and activates the fight-flight-free-fawn mechanism in the amygdala (which is the survival response) and simultaneously disconnects the rest of the brain from the frontal lobe (which controls learning, memory, reasoning, decision-making, etc). There is no way learning of rules and positive behaviour can take place under these circumstances.

Also, come to think, why do you think many adults hit their wives/husbands? Where do you think that response came from? 99 out of 100 times, they were raised in environments where flogging and hitting were the way to respond when one was not happy with another’s behaviour. It clearly leads to generational trauma!

 

IS THERE SUCH A THING AS MODERATE FLOGGING?

I understand this is so deeply ingrained in our culture that we have, over time, come to formalise physical abuse as a form of discipline.  We have gone to the extent of arguing that “flogging is African”. But is this really true? Or are we reacting to something deeply engraved in our past?

Now, this is not to say you should not spank a child, but the point is what is your goal? What do you want to achieve with the child? Is flogging the most effective corrective measure for that behaviour? Is the child able to make the connection? Those are critical questions to answer as regards what's moderate or commensurate and what is not.

Any form of corporal punishment, no matter how moderate or mild, has a built-in risk of intensifying. According to studies, parents who employed physical punishment run a higher chance of subjecting their children to serious abuse over time. Why? Because it’s not effective. Children will become resistant and find ways to deal with it and the adult will be forced to increase the intensity with the hope the behaviour will change, leading to subjecting the child to physical abuse and worsening behavioural outcomes.

With all these said, if you must – spank, do not be inhumane or reactive. Spank if you must, but make sure it is applied when appropriate, proportionate to the misbehaviour and be sure the child is able to make the connection between the behaviour and consequence.  

Again, if our goal is to correct, and change behaviour to help children make positive choices, is flogging the only and most effective tool? Why are we not exploring other strategies?

 

SOME ALTERNATIVES TO FLOGGING

Teach them what you expect:  Instead of punishing them for misbehaving, teach them what they can do differently.

Tell them, “Next time, please hang your coat up in the closet! How can we help you remember to do this?”

One of the main problems with spanking is that it doesn’t teach your child how to behave better. Spanking your child because they threw a temper tantrum won't teach them how to calm down the next time they are upset.

2. Set limits: Instead of telling your children what to do try telling them what you are going to do or allow.

 “I will be happy to take you to your friends when you have finished your chores.”

3. Attach logical consequences to misbehaviour: Providing a logical consequence is often very effective. Always tie the consequence back to the misbehaviour for instance, if they won't put their trucks away, don't let them play with them the remainder of the day. Children are more likely to understand that their actions have direct consequences when the consequence is linked to the behaviour issue.

4. Loss of privilege: The objective is to teach your child to make better decisions in the future, not to punish them into submission. Nonetheless, this requires practice. Teach them that the penalty for bad decisions is the loss of a privilege. Loss ought to be connected to actions.

5. Ignoring Little Misconduct: In some cases, selective ignoring is more efficient than spanking. This does not imply that you should ignore anything your child is doing that is risky or improper. However, you can disregard attention-seeking conduct.

6. Recognize their positive behaviours:  So, when they hang up that coat tell them how much you appreciate that! Too often parents only notice their children’s misbehaviors and disregard the things they do well.

7. Natural consequences: Let children take in lessons from their errors. For instance, if your child claims they won't wear a jacket, allow them to walk outside and be cold—as long as it's safe to do so. If you believe your child will learn from a mistake they made by themselves, use natural consequences. You should keep an eye on things to make sure your child isn't at any genuine risk.

8. Reward Good behaviour:  Rather than just spanking them for misbehaviour, rewarding them for doing something good, this can quickly stop misbehaviour. Instead of emphasising the inappropriate behaviour that they should try to avoid, rewards let kids concentrate on what they need to accomplish to obtain privileges.

 

Students getting a prep talk

HOW EFFECTIVE ARE THESE STRATEGIES COMPARED TO FLOGGING?

Flogging has short-term effects and loads of other negative after-effects in the long run. However, these other strategies can be creatively applied to bring about compliance, teach positive behaviour and at the same time support the child’s socioemotional, behavioural, cognitive, and physical growth.

These other discipline strategies respect the rights of the child as a human and honour their emotions while helping them make connections between their actions and the consequences. This makes the child feel valued and respected. Whereas flogging is highly reactive, mostly emotion-driven, and gives little room for the child to learn.  

Additionally, flogging predisposes the child to adverse childhood experiences with a great tendency for developing physical, mental health, emotional, and behavioural issues in later life.

Rather than lashing out, inflicting pain, and punishing, the goal should be positive discipline, correction, and teaching positive skills at all times – most importantly – in love.

BUT WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE FOR A TEACHER OR PARENT WHO HAS TO HANDLE LOTS OF CHILDREN AT A TIME?

It can be truly challenging especially when as a teacher you have to handle lots of children who seem to be out of control - all at a time. This is hard work, I must admit. That is one of the reasons why teachers prefer quick-fix methods to suppress the emotions, “control” the environment and feel a sense of accomplishment.

My first challenge to you is that the task of a teacher or parent is a noble one - there is no shortcut to it. Thus, the first challenge would be to be willing to accept the responsibility to go the longer path of raising healthy children. When you accept this responsibility, then you can go farther.

The second challenge for you as a teacher is to know - without reservation - that ALL BEHAVIOUR is STORY being told to you by the child. I know it feels like “stubbornness” or “misbehaviour” to you. But that is not just and/or always the case. And when you continue to see it that way, you will want to punish it. But when you see all behaviour as a child’s communication to you, you will most likely handle it intentionally!

With that said, when a whole class or most of the pupils in a class are dysregulated, what a teacher needs to do is to get the class under control. Your best bet would be to introduce a group activity to help them regulate.

Teachers always feel that what they have to teach at that moment is more important than anything else. So at all costs, they have to deliver! Well that needs to change. Because the child's mental and emotional state needs to be stable for learning to take place.

Hunger, fatigue, pain, distractions, etc, can result in a disorganised class. In such cases, feel free to pause your curriculum and:

Introduce a breathing exercise and get everyone to participate. E.g. the 4-4-6 breathing technique. While in a relaxed position, breathe in through the nose while counting to 4; hold your breath while counting to 4; and breathe out slowly through the mouth while counting to 6. Repeat this as needed.

Introduce an activity that helps them focus. Colouring, painting, drawing, or even imaginative exercises.

Introducing a fun song that kids' love that is familiar to them. It can be about parts of the body, or nature or anything that gets them to demonstrate.

Introduce an activity or game or task that gets them engaging and working together.

The goal is for you as a teacher to break in between sessions to introduce something to help the pupils regulate and gain control. However, if it's behaviour like fighting in the classroom. You might use the flip it method.

FLIP IT® is a strategy that offers a simple, kind, strength-based, commonsense and effective four step process to address children’s day to day challenging behaviour. The four steps are embodied in the FLIP mnemonic which stands for

F – Feelings

Gently talk with the children about their feelings. Tell them what you see and hear as a result of their emotions. Help them to identify the root feelings causing the behaviour.

L – Limits 

Remind the children of the positive limits and expectations you have for their behaviour. Loving and simple limits help surround children with a sense of consistency, safety and trust.

I – Inquiries 

Encourage the children to think about solutions to their challenges. Ask questions that promote problem-solving and healthy coping skills. Inquiries invite children to think, learn, and gain self-control.

P – Prompts 

Provide creative cues, clues, and suggestions for the children who are having difficulty. Enthusiastic, bright ideas can lead the way to better problem-solving skills.

FLIP IT is nothing new, but transforms best practices into a strategy that is easy to remember, applicable in a variety of challenging situations and portable.

There are many approaches and strategies available to teachers and parents to transform approaches to discipling. But the first step is recognizing that these approaches are effective and will yield positive results for discipline!